It is for Freedom, Christ set us Free

Do you remember the first time you felt freedom?  

Every summer, my family vacationed at Smith Mountain Lake, VA. To this day, I still remember my first boat ride. It was a picture-perfect day. The sun was warm, the water was as smooth as glass, and the boat glided effortlessly across the lake. Could it get any better?

Then one day, it happened!My uncle turned s to me and asked, “Do you want to drive?”In that moment, boating became more than fun, it became freedom. Standing at the helm, grasping the responsibility of steering the boat, and looking at the smiles on everyone’s faces is a memory I’ll never forget.A few summers later, we were heading back from a lakeside restaurant after dinner when a storm rolled in almost out of nowhere. My first instinct was to keep going and push through it.I looked to my uncle who calmly explained the importance of turning the boat to draw near the closest harbor and dropping anchor. At first, it seemed like a delay. But he knew this storm will soon pass.  If the boat wasn't secure, the wind, the waves, and even other boats could push us into greater danger. Sometimes the safest and wisest thing you can do is anchor instead of charging ahead.

Parenting our young adult children works much the same way.

As our kids grow into adulthood, they begin navigating waters of their own. They make their own decisions, face their own storms, and chart their own course. They still need us, but not as the captain of their boat.They need us to be a trusted anchor.

When our lives are anchored in faith, wisdom, and love, we become a safe harbor they know they can return to, not because we’re there to take over the helm, but to offer wisdom, encouragement, and hope.

How does a parent become a trusted anchor?

Not by having all the answers.

We become trusted anchors as our own hearts are firmly anchored in Christ. The more secure we are in Him, the more grounded we are in life’s storms. And the calmer we are the more our adult children will know they have someone they can turn to when the waters get rough. 

Our children may not remember every conversation, but they will remember what it felt like when they are with us.  

Paul gives us a beautiful framework in Colossians 3:15–16:

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts... Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly... teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom."

Notice the order.

Let. Dwell. Teach.

Before we offer advice...

We first allow Christ's peace (soul harmony) to rule our own hearts. A peace that surpasses all understanding.

Jesus invites us to abide in Him.

The writer of Hebrews echoes this truth:

"Fixing our eyes on Jesus..." (Hebrews 12:2)

We naturally become like whatever captures our attention. As we continually look to Christ, His peace begins changing our hearts, and His wisdom becomes our words.

When we dwell/abide, we take a prayer breath, before we advise, we respond  with peace instead of react with unstable emotion. Let your prayer breath be your first word.

Ecclesiastes also reminds us that wisdom often sounds like restraint:

"Let your words be few." (Ecclesiastes 5:2)

Sometimes the most powerful words a parent can say are simply:

"I love you."

“I’m proud of you”

"I'm here for you."

“Keep going”

Today, remember L.E.T.

L — Listen first.To Jesus before speaking, and to your child before responding.

E — Engage wisely.Respond with peace instead of reacting from emotion.

T — Trust God.Your child's future depends more on God's faithfulness than on your perfect words.

As we become more like Christ, we become the trusted anchor parents our adult children naturally return to, not because they have to, but because they know they'll find love, wisdom, grace, and peace.When our lives are anchored (dwell) in Christ, our presence becomes a safe harbor, a place where our children know they are loved, welcomed, and safe.  

We become a trusted anchor.

Prayer

Heavenly Father,

Teach us to be quick to listen and slow to speak. Lead us to whatever builds up our faith and deepens our love. 

Let your ways become our holy pursuit. Let us become parents who reflect Jesus, steadfast, humble, gracious, and full of wisdom.

Let Your peace rule in our hearts. Let the Word of Christ dwell in us richly.

Lead our kids to live a life worthy of their calling they have received from you Lord Jesus. 

Search our hearts. May our ways be the ways of you Lord according to your will.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.